This is great, Sharon! I'm glad you navigated a way through and that things worked out, differently from how you initially imagined, but with an opportunity for adventure. And thank you so much for the mention. I'm glad my How I Met My Match piece sparked you to share more about your own life.
So much wisdom in this Sharon. Sometimes you meet someone when you are not expecting it - when you are concentrating on other things. Reading your experiences just makes one realise how tough life is, and what a struggle it is not to be sunk by it - to learn, evolve and carry on when your chin is on the floor. It's what makes us what we are, and so generous of you to share. I can relate as I'm sure everyone who has lived a few decades can.
I loved the bit on online dating: "He’ll list “snowboarding” as a key attribute, as if that’s the secret to a good relationship. I don't know about you, but I've never found myself in a post-coital haze thinking, "That was wonderful, Dave, but I really wish you could snowboard.” Genius! 😂
Thanks so much Jules. Yes, they were testing times, but as you say, we’ve all gone through it to some degree. You don’t realise at the time, the effect these dating experiences have on your disposition.
Really interesting journey. So glad you found a happy ending (or middle bit). Didn’t know there were matrimonial services in 17th century! I was going to say, bet there were fewer trolls 👿 but then remembered the rotters in Jane Austin
Reminds me of a friend whose spouse was busy rewriting their history to justify running off with some other guy's missus, exclaiming, "I don't how we ever got together!" "Easy" says she. "You're fussy and I'm not!"
That’s really good Sharon, it’s still the same or worse 20 years on ! Thank you for reading my ‘dating app hell’ post and the amazing compliments. My last latest one , ‘cathartic not on your Nelly’ I finally state the apps are gone. I can’t face it anymore. I’m so glad you finally met someone and now living in Australia, what an experience, that’s amazing. 🤩
I am making my way through your posts as we speak! I don't blame you. I hated the well-intentioned dating advice, more so when it came from the smug marrieds! So I really didn't want my piece to be about equating happiness with finding a man, but at the same time, I totally get it - all you want is someone to have your back. I look forward to keeping in touch. You write beautifully, and with heart.
Giving up looking for a man is, in my experience, the best way of finding one. Interesting to see how your writing and self-awareness have developed in 10 years.
Thanks Ros. I’m super critical of my work, to the extent I obsess over minor details, even after pressing the publish button…So I was naturally reluctant to share my piece from the past, but I’m glad I did.
Sharon, this is simply excellent. I enjoyed reading this so much. At 62, having just left a relationship with a 52 year old…(though I don’t wanna grow old alone), I’m way more cautious about who I’d be willing to get involved with.
You made some really good points in regards to men’s profiles. Stuff I had not considered or didn’t understand what I was so turned off…
This is so good. I restacked my favorite part. I am very happy that things turned out amazingly well for you.
"Ten years on, I’m not that person anymore. I’m far happier now, and although my husband* deserves plenty of credit for that, a big part of my growth was learning to rid myself of resentment. Shortly after writing the piece below, in 2014, I made the choice to step back from dating, pull up the Shazza drawbridge, and focus on finding joy in the quiet corners of my own life.
It wasn’t a grand epiphany or an overnight transformation, but rather a slow realisation that I didn’t need to compromise my self-worth to fit someone else’s mould—I just needed to embrace a different version of reality."
This is great, Sharon! I'm glad you navigated a way through and that things worked out, differently from how you initially imagined, but with an opportunity for adventure. And thank you so much for the mention. I'm glad my How I Met My Match piece sparked you to share more about your own life.
So much wisdom in this Sharon. Sometimes you meet someone when you are not expecting it - when you are concentrating on other things. Reading your experiences just makes one realise how tough life is, and what a struggle it is not to be sunk by it - to learn, evolve and carry on when your chin is on the floor. It's what makes us what we are, and so generous of you to share. I can relate as I'm sure everyone who has lived a few decades can.
I loved the bit on online dating: "He’ll list “snowboarding” as a key attribute, as if that’s the secret to a good relationship. I don't know about you, but I've never found myself in a post-coital haze thinking, "That was wonderful, Dave, but I really wish you could snowboard.” Genius! 😂
Thanks so much Jules. Yes, they were testing times, but as you say, we’ve all gone through it to some degree. You don’t realise at the time, the effect these dating experiences have on your disposition.
Really interesting journey. So glad you found a happy ending (or middle bit). Didn’t know there were matrimonial services in 17th century! I was going to say, bet there were fewer trolls 👿 but then remembered the rotters in Jane Austin
Thanks Lettice. Yes the rotters are always there, in one form or another!
Reminds me of a friend whose spouse was busy rewriting their history to justify running off with some other guy's missus, exclaiming, "I don't how we ever got together!" "Easy" says she. "You're fussy and I'm not!"
That’s really good Sharon, it’s still the same or worse 20 years on ! Thank you for reading my ‘dating app hell’ post and the amazing compliments. My last latest one , ‘cathartic not on your Nelly’ I finally state the apps are gone. I can’t face it anymore. I’m so glad you finally met someone and now living in Australia, what an experience, that’s amazing. 🤩
I am making my way through your posts as we speak! I don't blame you. I hated the well-intentioned dating advice, more so when it came from the smug marrieds! So I really didn't want my piece to be about equating happiness with finding a man, but at the same time, I totally get it - all you want is someone to have your back. I look forward to keeping in touch. You write beautifully, and with heart.
Thank you so much ☺️
Giving up looking for a man is, in my experience, the best way of finding one. Interesting to see how your writing and self-awareness have developed in 10 years.
Thanks Ros. I’m super critical of my work, to the extent I obsess over minor details, even after pressing the publish button…So I was naturally reluctant to share my piece from the past, but I’m glad I did.
Sharon, this is simply excellent. I enjoyed reading this so much. At 62, having just left a relationship with a 52 year old…(though I don’t wanna grow old alone), I’m way more cautious about who I’d be willing to get involved with.
You made some really good points in regards to men’s profiles. Stuff I had not considered or didn’t understand what I was so turned off…
Well done!
This is so good. I restacked my favorite part. I am very happy that things turned out amazingly well for you.
"Ten years on, I’m not that person anymore. I’m far happier now, and although my husband* deserves plenty of credit for that, a big part of my growth was learning to rid myself of resentment. Shortly after writing the piece below, in 2014, I made the choice to step back from dating, pull up the Shazza drawbridge, and focus on finding joy in the quiet corners of my own life.
It wasn’t a grand epiphany or an overnight transformation, but rather a slow realisation that I didn’t need to compromise my self-worth to fit someone else’s mould—I just needed to embrace a different version of reality."
Relatable and lovely.