52 Comments
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laura thompson's avatar

I hear you Sharon. It always fascinates me in Jane Austen how people stay with other people for WEEKS. I know there were servants and all but still... my idea of pure hell.

Sharon Joslyn's avatar

Couldn’t agree more Laura! And thanks so much for sharing.

Robert Machin's avatar

The Chinese have a saying: “house guests [are] like fish. Both stink after three day”…

Sara's avatar

Hooooboy! As someone who has had their inalws living with them since a October (they leave this Sunday) I have so many thoughts and feelings! The thoughts are mainly - please leave. And the feelings are rage and resentment.

Rose Jones's avatar

😂😂😂

When I think how fecking wonderful my parents were for so many years putting up with all of us staying with various partners and children etc. I am just in awe!

I mean, I love having guests but not in this house because I can hear everything. And I actually like having a reason to clean the house otherwise housework can feel a bit like drudgery.

But now it is a bit awkward. I am out of the habit. I don't want to get up early cos I like reading for at least an hour every morning. Also, although I don't have HRT cream I do have an array of tablets to be taken and the routine can be knocked for six by unexpected events.

Thank you once again for the entertainment x

Sharon Joslyn's avatar

I hear you Rose. Thanks as always for reading - and sharing.

Lewis Holmes's avatar

Every single word of this is legit!

One of the joys of living in a flat is that we rarely have houseguests. When we do, it's usually The Muse's mates. I'm excellent at hosting, I sometimes even leave a chocolate on their pillow, but lord do I resent the morning tango with an extra body in the house.

Jules's avatar

So much truth.

I am a morning person and you are right, no matter how quiet you are, people don't like it. As a result I don't stay at other people's houses, although I think other than that sin I have been a reasonably well-behaved house guest. I agree with you about having relations under someone else's roof. Why? Are they sex addicts? Can't it wait? I'm with you.

Enjoyed this very much. Thanks! 😊

Sharon Joslyn's avatar

I can’t imagine you being anything other than an impeccable houseguest Jules!

Jules's avatar

Ah thanks! 😊

I have a dear friend who has stayed with us a couple of times and I can honestly say that when she leaves, her room looks better than when she arrived. So considerate. Good manners do still exist 😊

Tracy Haynes's avatar

Oh you are funny. I didn't recognise myself in any of the examples (thank GOD). I'm just the overnight guest that decides to ruin the weekend for everyone, including myself, you and your poor Mum and insisting on visiting one or two hospitals over the weekend. You are welcome! xx

Sharon Joslyn's avatar

That was one helluva ride! 👀

Marci Cornett's avatar

My aunt always used to say to guests, "Make yourself at home. That's where you ought to be anyway." I seem to have inherited the same spirit of hospitality.

Francis F's avatar

I feel like this ! And I no longer even like being a house guest anymore , I wonder did they actually change the sheets after the last house guest left ! The loo with the dodgy seat , not my cleaning standards 😂😂 I’m actually writing a post about all the different types of Air B&Bers I used to host !! There were definitely the sex couple In there, they broke my flipping bed 😱🤦🏻‍♀️😆

Lowri Williams's avatar

Now I’m not paranoid at all! 🤣

Sharon Joslyn's avatar

Hahaha! Not YOU! Never 😘

judith barrow's avatar

Wonderfully honest

Julie Dee's avatar

Excellent post Sharon. I so relate and it made me laugh. I don’t even like my mum staying (and she’s the only person who does 😂). Because she’s so loud. I definitely should live alone with a cat 😂

Sharon Joslyn's avatar

Funny Julie. I’m definitely more intolerant these days…It’s just such a faff!

Stacy Rocklein's avatar

Very entertaining read and sooooooo relatable!

Sharon Joslyn's avatar

Thanks Stacy :)

Margaret Bennett's avatar

So funny Sharon. I can relate to so much. I am the annoying morning person. The one who doesn’t sleep so has to make tea at silly o clock. Why are kettles so loud?

I used to be a good host but no longer have the energy to do the double clean. 🧽

Sharon Joslyn's avatar

That’s it Margaret - the double clean wipes me out!

Jenn's avatar

Hahaha. There, you said it. Thank you Sharon. Truth has spoken. And proof that HRT cream doesn’t quite go far enough to work on our tolerance meter.

Sharon Joslyn's avatar

It’s not nearly powerful enough Jen!

Daniel Puzzo's avatar

This was a riot, had me chuckling throughout, especially this banger: "But if it’s yellow? Let it mellow."

I am actually a great houseguest, I swear, I don't do any of these things, but do not worry, I am most definitely NOT coming to Australia anytime soon, you can relax 😂

I'm very much the same if I do have guests coming - my first thought is, damn it, I have to bloody well clean, ugghhh...

Sharon Joslyn's avatar

I knew you weren’t a nocturnal flusher, the moment I saw you!

Daniel Puzzo's avatar

Nor am I much of a daytime flusher - I let it mellow much of the day to save water and then flush when the stench is too overpowering to concentrate.

Actually, in my student days I lived in a house with some oddball older men (it's not what you think, I was subletting a mere room!) and they had so many guests coming and going, I kept myself to myself and spent much of my time outside the house anyway. My room was right next to the toilet, and these guys NEVER FLUSHED unless they'd dropped a deuce. That toilet bowl was neon orange at times and when I flushed, they'd tell me off for wasting water.

That's...a bit extreme, I'd say.

Jane Mundy's avatar

Thanks Sharon, this is hilarious and so relatable. Love the raccoon on meth, but wait, that's me loading the dishwasher. My houseguest left two days ago and I'm still exhausted.

Sharon Joslyn's avatar

I feel your pain Jane. Thanks so much.